Woe, Is Not Me

Woe. If it is not yesterday's blunders or tomorrow's uncertainies, then it is our constant hunger for acceptance and approval. Not just with others, but with ourselves. They (whoever "they" are) say that the most harmful words are the words we say to ourselves. It's a fact. Who knows you better than you? No one can condemn you more than you can, and, conversely, you cannot bring yourself up as high you wish. We gather and collect woe over time and store it within ourselves, not paying attention to how much space we actually have to put it. Woe, like dirty laundry in the bedroom, begins to clutter and find its place deep within. Time passes; you forget the woe. Then, all of a sudden and without notice, we feel down. "What could that possibly be? Ugh, not this again." It reaches the surface again like the stench of the clothes hidden under beds for far too long. Do some laundry. That horrid odor in our gym shorts and the treacherous woe in our lives will not just dissappear; it needs cleansing. That cleansing can invlove almost anything. Maybe there are people who we need to apologize to, or maybe there are people who we need to forgive. Maybe it is time to tell the truth. Once we "clean out" that woe, we realize that we have so much room for happiness! Self-acceptance and approval becomes easier when we make space for it. Wallowing in self-pity is not a valid option. All the time wasted on harming ourselves and bringing ourselves down takes from the time we could be spending bringing ourselves up.

They (the same people from above) also say that the best way to feel better about yourself is to do something for someone else. Altruism is more personal than philanthropy. Give money if you can; give time if you can not. Either way, the selflessness involved in giving is so potent that you feel as though you have made a difference.

Personally, the best way to block out woe is to smile. Never will I forget the first time I went to Puerto Rico with my family. Bored and tired, I found myself sitting down outside a chapel. I wanted to go home, my feet hurt. Suddenly, however, as if someone decided to send me some sunshine, a noun walked by. Our eyes caught each others, and she just smiled. I'll never forget that smile. The way that Nick Carraway describes Jay Gatsby's smile applies here. Her smile caused me to smile. It is not a slippery slope; it is a water-slide! After that pleasant encounter, I began to smile at everyone. I hope my smiles have caused at least one other person to smile.

The point is that negative energy can cloud us from our happiness. We say "woe, is me" and other self-deprecating phrases that forbid us from learning from our past and experiences. Empiricism requires us to forgive ourselves.

Forgive yourself. You deserve it.
Say to yourself: "Woe, is NOT me."

=D